( ゚∀゚) Konbini goto no yodesu (^ω^ )

( ゚∀゚) Seems like he’s a convenience store robber. (^ω^ )



(#゚∀゚) …fuck…

He was a penniless person.

He lost all in the futures trading.

(#゚∀゚)  To think that the「Moon’s soil」futures was a scam…

Futures, so bad.

(#゚∀゚) It makes me mad… it makes me mad!

( ゚∀゚) Yeah! Let’s do a robbery!

( ゚∀゚) A weapon….I don’t have any but…

( ゚∀゚) Yeah! If I put my hand like a gun in the pocket of my jacket

( ゚∀゚) It’ll look like there’s a gun in the pocket!

( ゚∀゚) Good! With that, I’ll get the money and, get the money and….

( ゚∀゚) …Right! I’ll flee in the south! And… fufufu….

( ゚∀゚) I’ll call nee-chans with big boobs and…the boobs…

( ゚∀゚) The boobs! The boobs!


It echoed in the night street.

Here is a convenience store.

( ^ω^) …The late night is calm-o

He’s Naito. It’s been 10 years he’s been working in this convenience store.
He’s an innate convenience store’s clerk.

He doesn’t rely on data, predicts a trendy product perfectly,
and makes the highest profit margin without any loss.

At one time, he also received proposition as a regular employee.
But he declined.

「I want to have contact with the customers-o.」

He really loved customers.


(‘A`) U~in(Automatic door)

( ^ω^) Welcome.

( ^ω^) (This customer will first go to the magazine corner-o)

( ^ω^) (And slowly shift towards the adult magazine corner…)

( ^ω^) (And at the end, he’ll buy a Pringles and go back-dao)

(‘A`) …

Naito could already predict the customer’s actions.
That ability grows more and more, and now, he was able to vaguely predict a customer even at first glance.

( ^ω^) (…Ah, shifting slowly and slowly towards the adult corner…)

,,(‘A`) slowly…


( ゚∀゚)

I’ll do that!

The robbery!

I’ll get the money and flee to the oversee!

The boobs! A boobs spree!


( ゚∀゚) Fu-!!


(;^ω^) (That customer looks…even at first glance, dangerous-o…)

( ^ω^) (Must be cautious! Buzzer’s over there! Color Ball’s there! Height check with the door!)


George executed the plan.

However, he made a few mistakes.

First, he made the hand in the shape of the gun, out of the pocket.

And he made a mistake on the most important part.


( ゚∀゚)ニア *Clac*

(;^ω^) …

(#゚∀゚)ニア Hand the boobs over here!!!


(;^ω^) …

(‘A`) ……

(#゚∀゚)ニア !!!!


( ^ω^) (…Oou…)

(#゚∀゚) What are you doing! Quickly hand the boobs over!


George didn’t noticed.
That his brain was already mixed up between money and boobs.

( ^ω^) …Bo…obs…do you mean-o…?

Naito thought at the moment if he was talking about the meat buns.
But there’s no customer who would buy a meat bun with this much spirit.

( ^ω^) …(Then it means…)

The other party was pointing his finger at him.
and saying 「hand the boobs over」.


( ^ω^) …

(*^ω^) …

He pulled out.

( ( ・) ・)

It’s Naito who has the qualification of a metabolic leader.
Certainly, the「boobs」were there.

He wanted as much as possible to answer the need of the customer.
So he pulled it out.

(*∩ω∩) Will this be enough-o?
( ( ・) ・)


(‘A`) ……Eh……What’s that……


(#゚∀゚) I’m saying to hand the boobs over!!




( ^ω^) (Eh…)

(#゚∀゚) Quickly hand the boobs over! If not….This guy will spit fire!!

George stressed the tip of the finger pulled out.


( ^ω^) …Fire…?

(#゚∀゚) I’ll fire!!

(‘A`) (Let’s hide in the toilet first…)


Naito thought.
It seems he have heard once.
That a magician could spit fire from the fingertip through a pipe within the body.


( ^ω^) (…Then it means, this person is a magician-kao…?)

(#゚∀゚) Hand it over right now!!!

(*^ω^) Ah, yes…
( ( ・) ・)

(#゚∀゚) Like I said…Hand the boobs over quickly!!!

The logic was crumbling.


(‘A`) …

(‘A`) (…This’d be too shameful to hide in the toilet…)



George was thinking.
Why, is this guy, taking off his clothes.

I’m, asking, for money.
But why is he, taking off his clothes.

Does it mean 「instead of the money」?
Where would there be a value, in a fat man’s chest!

Yeah…It is so…

This guy too, is looking down at me!!

( ( ・) ・)

George’s anger exploded.
Due to exploding, he made another mistake.


(#゚∀゚) Lick iiiiiiit!!!!!!!!!

( ゚ω゚) …!

Naito who was pointed by finger too, was disconcerted this time.


Does it mean to lick the extended finger?
If not, does it mean to lick his boobs, that he pulled out?


(‘A`) …

(‘∀`) Eeh…It’s odd…


(#゚∀゚)ニア Lick iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!!

Naito was decided.


Naito thought.
What to lick? Something in the convenience store.

That is, a troche. (*A small medicated lozenge or round designed to dissolve. For example, to soothe the throat as a cough drop.)
Since how many years ago was it authorized to sell them in a convenience store by law amendment.
But anyway, there is troches in the convenience store.

If he says to lick, it could only be that.
Indeed, he thought that it’s absurd to lick the customer’s finger, or his boobs.

Slowly, Naito came out of the cash register.

And he walked without taking his eyes off of George, he took the troche.

He came back in the cash register and tore the bag.
He put the troche in the mouth. His throat was soothed.


(#゚∀゚) ……

(#゚∀゚) Are you licking it, bastaaaaaaard!!!!!!!!


( ゚ω゚) But I’m licking iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!!!!!!!

(‘A`) (He’s licking iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!!!!!!!)

(#゚∀゚) You bastard…don’t lick iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!!!!!!!!!

( ^ω^) (Oou…)

(‘A`) (He’s a tyrant……)


Fuck! Fuck! To be even looked down by a convenience store’s employee…!
Alright…Alright!! I’ll make this bastard fucking crap out!
Money(=boobs) comes after that!!

George closed his bare finger to Naito.

( ゚∀゚) …Fufufu…You bastard, you licked it, huh…

( ^ω^) (Yes)

(‘A`) (Certainly like you’ve seen)

( ゚∀゚) …No need anymore. You, if I shoot your hand or foot, would you become more obedient?

(#゚∀゚) Would ya!? Good, I’m shooting now!? I’ll be shooting!?


( ^ω^) (Shoot…?)

( ^ω^) (With the finger…?)

(‘A`) (…flick…?)

The man who pulled his finger is saying that he’ll 「shoot」.
Apart from flicking, what could it be.

But Naito got aware of another possibility.

The finger, and the word 「shoot」.

( ^ω^) (Perhaps…)

( ^ω^) (An email with his phone…?)


Shoot him licking the troche with his chest out,
upload it on sites like Imepita, and even make a thread on VIP?
(*イメピタ/Imepita : photos and videos uploading site ; *VIP : 2ch)


( ゚ω゚) All but that dear customeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer!!!!!!!!



The one that is used like a place of exchange between neighbours.
The bench in front of the store was Naito’s proposal.
Grandmother or Grandfather, and young people, salarymen, house workers.

The bench prepared in the hope for them to rest on it while waiting for the the bus on the bus stop to come in front of the shop.
It already became a must-have in this village, a very very important resting place.

But that is now going to become a 「bench prepared by the pervert」.

( ゚ω゚) Anything but thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!!!!!!

(‘A`) (What is?)

(#゚∀゚) (!!Is he finally crapping out! Then……)

(#゚∀゚) Then if you don’t want me to shoot, quickly hand the boobs over!!!!!!!!

( ゚ω゚) Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees!!!!!!!
( ( ・) ・)

(#゚∀゚) So then…are you licking iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!!!!!!

(‘A`) (I’m still licking it)


( ゚ω゚) That bench is everyone’s resting plaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace!!!!!!!!
( ( ・) ・)

(‘A`) (Ah, is it so……)

(#゚∀゚) (What?)

(#゚∀゚) I don’t give a fuck! quickly the boobs…the boobs…



I was, from a while ago…

saying 「boobs」…?


( ゚ω゚) Please have mercyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!
( ( ・) ・)

(‘∀`) (Somehow it’s really funny)


( ゚∀゚) …

I got it wrong….

( ゚∀゚) …

Boobs and money were two different things.


( ゚ω゚) Please have mercyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!
( つ・) ・)..shakeshake

(‘A`) (That’s a minus point…)


I got it wrong….

( ゚∀゚) …Th-that erm…

( ゚ω゚) Mercyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!
( つ・) ・)..Shakeshake


( ゚∀゚) …Put it back

( ゚ω゚) Ooooh.

( ^ω^) Eh, ah, yes…

(‘∀`) (Put back…)


( ゚∀゚) …I said it wrong. Hey, give me the money

( ^ω^) Ah, if you are talking about the ATM, it’s there. Although there’ll be a commission fee at this hour…

(#゚∀゚) Not that! Take the money out of the cash register!!

( ^ω^) Eh…?


He takes the money out of the cash register.
So then it means the 「change」.

And, the change means, when a product is bought and to return back to the customer who gives a bigger sum then the price.

Naito was showing his chest.
And the customer was saying to give change.
But, it’s not like he gave a bill of ten thousand yen.

He thought it was irrational.


( ゚ω゚) Then give the money fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirst!!!!!!!!!

(#゚∀゚) Eh……Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh???????????!

(‘A`) (Aah, I see. So since by showing his chest, there’s a fee occurring, and if he’s asking for change, to give the money first…)

( ゚ω゚) Dear customeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer!!!!!

( ゚∀゚) Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees!!!!!!

( ゚ω゚) Change is the comeback of the biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiil!!!!!!!!

(‘A`) (What’s that)

( ゚ω゚) Honestly, I don’t think this is a body worth payiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing!!!!!!!!

(‘∀`) (It is so)

( ゚ω゚) But the change is after payiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing!!!!!!!

( ゚ω゚) Woaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!!!

( ゚∀゚) ……..


Why is this guy trying so hard…

Although he’d be a part-timer at most…


I graduated at a university.

I got a job.

I went along with the superior’s afterwork(*a “tradition” in Asia to go and eat and drink alcohol with the company, mostly decided by the superiors)

The superior took me under his wing.

The superior got ousted.

There was no more place for me.

It didn’t matter. I had savings.

I thought to live with doing in the finance.

To go well, to go well…I failed.

I failed….

( ゚ω゚) If there’s no bill, the change is a Noooooooon !!!!!!!!


This guy, really, what is he.


I, what am I.


( ゚ω゚) The change is the money’s vibratioooooooooooooon!!!!!!!!

When I look at…this guy…

( ゚ω゚) The boobs will be 50yen and thank you for your purchaseeeeeeeee!!!!!!!

What is he…?

( ゚ω゚) Ah of course, it’s 50 yen with the boooooooooooooooooooth!!!!!!!


( ゚ω゚) So the change will never-diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiie!!!!!!!!



Okay, so…

( ゚∀゚) …I know that this is not MacDonalds but………


( ゚ω゚) Boobs! 50yen! change! Non!

(‘∀`) (What’s he saying)

( ゚∀゚) …Sorry but, could I…order a「smile」….?


( ゚ω゚)

( ゚ω゚)
( ^ω^)

( ^ω^) SmileSmile(*nico nico)

Thank you.
Thank you.

So, let’s say.

( ゚∀゚) …

( ゚∀゚) …thank you




The Pringles please
Yes sir-o.




The day after, a certain man went to a certain convenience store with his CV.

First, he bowed.


And, the man begun to walk.



( ゚∀゚) Seems like he’s a convenience store robber. (^ω^ )

( ゚∀゚) How about boobs?

( ^ω^)  We don’t sell boobs in our store-o

( ゚∀゚) Then what about a smile?

( ^ω^) We don’t have it as standard too-o

( ゚∀゚) …

( ゚∀゚) …

( ゚∀゚) 싱긋

( ゚∀゚) Smile

( ^ω^) 싱긋싱긋

( ^ω^) SmileSmile (*nico nico)

(‘A`) (「3 times picking lewd tea leaves at the maiden’s field」,huh…Ha~a ha~a…) (*I don’t know this idiom…)

(‘A`) (I’ll buy a Pringles…)



The end

Translator’s note

Merry X-mas! there’s a lot of the original humor lost during the translation phase but I hope it’s not completely disaster 😛 haha.


source : http://vipmain.sakura.ne.jp/end/693/002.html


Translator : KobatoChanDaiSuki

Proofreader : Zenneth

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