FFF-Class Trashero – Chapter 59: Who are you?

 

The strongest Archmage in Fantasia, the Sage, was a virgin because of his unfortunate, peculiar constitution of breaking out into nosebleeds at the slightest stimulation. Yet the engineer muppet had also had zero opportunities to meet women, as he had done nothing but research golems cooped up in a small room. So he was also a virgin.

It was because two genius virgins met that this sort of atrocious golem came to be born.

The teamwork of the dog and tiger was extraordinary.

“The most important part, artificial intelligence is missing.”

“We can’t insert something like the emotions of a man, can we now?”

There was something that didn’t exist even in the Sage’s Tower where all kinds of materials were hoarded: the heart of a woman. If such a thing had existed there, then the Sage wouldn’t have remained a virgin. This was why there was the so-called ‘Socket’ in this weak-looking golem’s Condition. Space had been left for new software to be loaded.

“It’s a prototype, after all… Bear with it, just bear with it.”

I decided to let the two virgin’s off on account of their passion, and I gave that thing they made the name Golem D.

But the mass-production type blue golem that would later be created would be a 7m tall super robot equipped with a drill and the ability to transform—there was no doubt on this, as I had meticulously confirmed the blueprint.

After leaving the development of the blue golem, which would become the cornerstone of a super robot army, to the two virgins, I left the Sage’s Tower.

*
*
*

I, too, had a dream like other people.

Transformation, combination, drill, rockets, funnels, overdrive…!
(T/N : Gundam references)
A super robot that inspired sweat-inducing over the top excitement. The day I had unsparingly invested for that dream of mine was wasted in vain due to the two virgins’ act of atrocity. And what remained for me was…

“Brother! Why are you so late?!”

A shabby little sister.

Furthermore, the competition results, which I had confirmed after arriving late at the magic arena, wasn’t all good.

[Kang Han Soo: Number 5, 9, 11, 16, 23]
[Lanuvel: Number 5, 8, 11, 22]

Number 5 and Number 11, who I had bet on together with Lanuvel, had succeeded in winning two times in a row, but Number 9 and Number 23, who fought close matches, ended up losing to Number 8 and Number 22. And Number 16 had dropped out on the first day.

“I completely lost to Lanuvel…?”

The energy of the universe had run dry, apparently.

“Ahem! We’re don’t resemble each other in the slightest, but Lanuvel is an extremely capable little sister. I have confidence in things like drawing lots such as this.”

“Kugh.”

To think she would humiliate me!

It was a moment where I missed the Job ‘Thief’.

After all the golem matches came to an end, Lanuvel and I went outside the city. Regardless of the magic competition’s final outcome, winning twice in a row meant I had already passed the point of breaking even. The key question was how many fold of profit there would be if, like Lanuvel, all the competitors you chose won twice in a row. But whatever the case, we had to wait until the final match ended in order to receive the betting dividend.

“Toss it, that sort of chicken feed.”

That final match would take place 6 days later. Even if they wanted to quickly go ahead with the competition, it couldn’t be helped as golems constantly required repairs and maintenance. This maintenance cost was why golems weren’t used in wars, but in later days the Dark Commerce and War God would shatter that common belief and preconception.

Money?

The Sage had already become my ardent follower. It was the same thing as one of the ten wealthiest individuals in the northern continent having become my sponsor. Just the material costs that had gone into Golem D overnight would amount to a frightful sum enough to buy a small city. There was no reason to go back to the city for some puny magic arena winnings.

… This wasn’t because I couldn’t get my hands on a super robot.

“Even if it’s chicken feed, it’s money Lanuvel earned with effort!”

“But anyone would see it as unearned income…?”

“You can’t ignore mental work!”

All the mental work done by the people of the world could be considered meaningless, apparently. She sure could brazenly claim that it was work, when she had randomly guessed without even knowing the arena competitors’ names and faces, let alone their personal histories.

In any case…

“Ow Ooow~!”

“Trooog~!”

I brought along my shabby little sister and set off on an adventure towards my original goal, the hidden ruins. The monsters we encountered along the way were busy running away, frightened by my holiness. It wasn’t like I couldn’t chase down and kill them, but since I would be at a greater advantage in the battle against the Demon King the lower my Level was, I didn’t take the trouble of doing so.

‘The Hero becoming more at a disadvantage the stronger he grows?’

What sort of crummy story setting was this?

▶Shrug: It was planned so that the Hero would cooperate with his companions to defeat the Demon King at an adequate level of difficulty, after all. If the Demon King were strong enough to crush the power of love and friendship, or on the contrary too weak, it would be a problem as that wouldn’t arouse any strong feelings upon victory.

‘Miss Trainee Teacher. Back in our neighborhood, we call that manipulation.’

A sham that presented love and friendship as superior! The number of morons fooled by this, who would spout nonsense such as “Let’s fight on together!” to their pathetic companions, had tremendously increased on Earth.

I wished that a good-natured, ordinary person like me, who was suffering from this moron fostering plan, would be quickly sent back to Earth.

▶Troubled: Love and friendship are greatly important. You’ll be able to understand if you complete the higher education curriculum.

Miss Trainee Teacher spoke little afterwards.

She was being too much to her secret friend!

“Brother, it lies beyond here.”

In possession of Holy Sword 3, Lanuvel led the way. Although we did come across several sentries by the guard posts built at every turn of the path, we were able to make brisk passage as my holiness was a far better guarantee of identity than any pass card.

We thus arrived at the king of the Magic Kingdom’s personal territory. Although there were royalty who would forbid entry into their personal territory for the sake of secretive outdoor plays, like the Dumpling King, the majority would use such lands as their exclusive hunting ground.

This monopoly of a hunting ground held a greatly important meaning. From the perspective of an Earthling, perhaps it could be described as an animal farm, or breeding ground.

You would gain EXP by hunting monsters, but it was possible for you to be hunted instead if you came across prey that was much too strong. The hunting grounds of royalty and nobles controlled this factor. For instance…

▷Race: Orc
▷Level: 31
▷Job: Mercenary(Wealth→Survivability↑)
▷Skills: Patrol(E) Survivability(F) Stamina(F)
▷Condition: Peaceful

By monopolizing a region where only weak Orcs like these were endlessly born, you would be able to raise your Level quickly and safely. While it would be good to share such a good hunting ground to everyone, the ecosystem would change if the Orcs were killed to the point of extinction and the type of monster would change. This was why it was necessary to restrict the hunting ground. Even monopolizing involved difficulties of its own.

Of course, there was no reason for me to consider that much.

“KuKu~!?”

“BuBu…!”

The Level 31 Orc turned around without hesitation, surprised at my holiness, and began to pitifully run away along with its similar-looking friends.

These guys sure knew how to run.

“Eyah!”

Lanuvel, who was beside me, took action with glittering eyes at that moment. Holding onto the ‘Sage’s Staff’, which I had lent to her as I thought it too wasteful to simply gather dust in my Storage, she didn’t let go of this opportunity. I had predicted this from the moment I saw the restless movements of Lanuvel’s rear end, showing her desire to quickly try out the staff.

Pzzzt-!

Lightning shot out from the golden orb at the staff’s end.

“VuVuuu~?!”

“NuNuu…?!”

The Orcs let out screams that sounded like pigs being butchered and fell flat on their faces.

Tsss…

The smell of grilled bacon wafted from their charred bodies. These Orcs who had harbored no intent to injure, let alone lust, were all murdered by my vicious little Magician sister who had neither blood nor tears to shed.

▶Perplexed: You’re not wrong on that, but it’s a bit…

The screams of the Orcs were quite loud, but the death throes of a monster in a densely wooded hunting ground were more common than the cries of an ordinary animal. This was why the Magic Kingdom’s soldiers who were guarding the surroundings of the prohibited hunting ground took no regard of the screams and passed over it.

I entered deep into the hunting ground under Lanuvel’s lead. There seemed to be some sort of special barrier hindering our way in the middle, but Lanuvel, who possessed Holy Sword 3, and I, the Hero, broke through it without a problem.

And then we discovered a certain cave.

“The Holy Sword auntie says it’s here.”

“I can tell by just looking.”

A scene of the Hero and Demon King was carved in an archaic fashion on the stone wall nearby the cave; however, I couldn’t agree with that mural—Demon King Pedonar was depicted as a hideous-looking monster, but the actual individual I had met in person was a gentleman with horns protruding from either side of his head. On the contrary, the Elf King’s wife, who was kidnapped by the Demon King, had seemed far more like a demon to me.

I looked above the cave.

[Cave of Training]

The purpose of the cave was clearly written on a golden board. According to Holy Sword 3’s experience, I would be able to attain true strength as a Hero in this place.

“Brother, she says only the Hero can enter this cave.”

Lanuvel thus spoke with a face deeply regretful at not being able to follow.

As for me, this news was like welcome rain.

“Alright. Holy Sword 3. If that true strength turns out to be training that advertises the power of friendship or love, you better be prepared to be used as kindling.”

After bullying Holy Sword 3, I slowly made my way into the cave. The inside wasn’t humid but dry, and it was also well ventilated against my expectations of it being stifling.

Woong-

Luminous orange rocks that naturally emitted a dim light even without fuel illuminated the darkness from everywhere.

All the walls within the cave were carved rather straight, and all sorts of things were drawn on them.

“Demon C, Demon K, Demon M… Hm, is that Demon D? The one with the crooked horn looks like Prince 1?”

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5 Replies to “FFF-Class Trashero – Chapter 59: Who are you?”

  1. Huangfu Haoyue

    Transformation, combination, drill, rockets, funnels, overdrive…!
    although it seems more like a reference of Tengen Toppa Gurren-Lagann, for me

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